New site

I moved over to WordPress. Go check it out:

Weeze X Christina

#SetHerFree - Protesting for the closure of Immigration Detention Centres in the UK

For the last two weeks I've found it exhausting and incredibly painful to walk for longer than five minutes due to a probable stress fracture, so I made the rather sad, but sensible decision not to go to Castle Fest (also called Return from Strength Fest) in Querfurt, Germany this weekend.  Still, I was determined not to have a solo pity party soundtracked with many teeny tiny violins. The huge silver lining for me was that it meant I was able to go to a demo calling for the closure of UK Immigration Removal Centres (IRC) outside the almost all Women's centre Yarl's Wood, in a Bedfordshire Business Park that has been operating since 2001. 

I cannot stress this more, the women held in these centres, many of whom say conditions are worse than prison, have committed NO crime, and in most cases have had sexual and violent crimes committed against them. Many suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) which is acutely worsened by being locked up. Women who came to seek refuge from all sorts of perpetrators (traffickers, family members, soldiers, other community groups) are now being intimidated, harassed (there have been allegations of sexual harassment) and locked up by a country that is bound by International Law to look after them. Don't get me started on morality, or basic human compassion. These conditions have led to numerous hunger strikes, self harm and attempts at suicide. 

For more about Yarls Wood itself - read this

Channel Four produced an undercover report on the centre. It's not light watching but it needs to be seen. Yarl's Wood: undercover in the secretive immigration centre

Women make up a smaller percent of asylum seekers, being much more vulnerable whilst at home, and during the journey to another country. They have less opportunity to escape their situations due to higher levels of illiteracy, being second class citizens and generally poorer and less empowered than men. For those that do escape and claim asylum here, to then be locked up by our Government, and 'looked after' by a private security firm is disgusting. I have spoken to many of these women over the phone, and yesterday I got to be there in solidarity with them. Making sure they knew we were fighting for them, and they are not alone, and not forgotten about. 

Approximately 400 of us turned up with placards, musical instruments and a lot of anger, and a hell of lot of love and compassion for our fellow human beings. We listened to some empowering and moving speeches by ex-detainees as well as Shami Chakrabarti, Helen Kennedy QC, Juliet Stevenson, the Bedford Tory MP Richard Fuller & comedian Josie Long (amongst others.) 

We then walked around the perimeter of the compound until we reached the side in which the inmates would be able to see us out of their windows. The guards attempted to arrange a game of bingo with prizes to try and entice inmates away from their rooms/the windows, but failed. 

The next hour was a mixture of both groups waving, chanting and singing. Many women inside waved clothes and flags, and put messages up against the window. Telephone conversations were shared over the microphone. It was emotional. Everyone I was with welled up a few times, either overcome by the sadness of the situation, the positivity and energy of the protest in general, but most importantly moved by the stories and strength of the women inside. A fence was pulled down, but it was a peaceful protest, and in parts had a carnival type atmosphere. Police presence was minimal, and definitely no intimidation or threats of arrest. I think they seemed more bewildered by it all than anything else. 

National news coverage here: 

Guardian Coverage of the Protest

BBC Coverage of the protest

There is another protest scheduled for August 8th. #SetHerFree

Those asylum seekers really do get it all... 

It's all about the moment when THAT feeling kicks in.

I guess I'm a 'seasoned traveller.' I don't even know exactly what that means but I hear it sometimes, and I think that's probably the way people would describe me. 

But whenever I land in a new place I feel lost and nervous. Going through immigration to get on a plane I'm excited. The way I travel it's normally early in the morning, a little hungover, on little sleep, dazed, but excited. When I  arrive? Nervous, anxious, wondering 'what the fuck am I doing, I want to be at home in bed.' I wish I wasn't there. I know no one. I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't want to do anything. This is massively multiplied when I'm travelling solo. 

I think about this because people always tell me they couldn't travel alone. I often feel like I can't, but I just do. I've booked quite a few trips at 3am, unable to sleep, thinking 'screw it, why not?' and just ignoring the trip until it's time to pack.  I tell myself it's okay and if I want to just spend the next three days in the hostel bed I can do. But I never do. I love the human minds capacity to compartmentalise. I wash at hostels. That's pretty much it. Even if it's a wonderful hostel with great people - that's not why I go to another country. It's all outside there. Deep down I know when I want to hide the only remedy is to get out.  Just put one foot in front of the other and keep going... Whether exploring and walking, or just sitting and watching people going about their daily lives. I end up happily sitting alone, but more often than not end up talking to locals, or other tourists, from places I don't know; it's all part of it. I woke up this morning (first morning in Bucharest), after a fabulous evening, meeting wonderful people, with 'the fear.' I made myself get washed and get out. Got some food, and then started walking... I did not want to be there. I can understand why, sitting in an office, wanting a holiday, people may not understand. But, it's not as easy and carefree as it seems... But at some point it clicks... And during the whole afternoon and evening I started doing that smiling at nothing and everything thing... The best things in life are normally hard at times. I'm not saying everyone should travel alone. I've done months alone, but just saying, even for a few days, it can be tough. But I also know the times it IS tough tends to be the times when I need and love it the most. 

The world is full of all types of beautiful places, and all types of incredible, friendly people. And the feeling of being somewhere, you don't know, alone, only doing what you WANT to do, with no time boundaries, no apologies, no considerations for anyone else, is truely the most liberating feeling. Sadly, I'll never know this. I've always got Humps by my side ;)  Ho hum. 

(end note.... I googled seasoned traveller.. and this come up.. quite amusing given where I work...

"Asking questions. Having a lot of experience of doing something and therefore knowing how to do it well: 

- a seasoned traveller

- a seasoner campaigner for human rights"

Saffa Shark love; Great Whites in Gansbaai

Old me; "I love sharks, such beautiful beautiful creatures, aside from the Great White, that's just incredibly awesome and impressive."

Me today; "I love sharks. They are beautiful beautiful creatures."

When I first saw the Great White Shark Conservation advert in the STA brochure I thought I'd be spending a week living on a research boat with marine biologists. I'm not sure why I thought this, but the ambiguous description also meant the other volunteers also no idea what to expect from the program either. My 4 days in Cape Town of sightseeing in the day and partying in the evening was finished off by an old mate coincidently being in town to play a gig at the Majesty. I stumbled into the BackPack hostel gone 1am phoneless with a wake up at 5am still completely pissed (Did I mention this gig was after a full day wine tour?) Greeted by the doorman with my phone as apparently a cab driver had 'found it' and perhaps I should give him a reward...

After orientation and a welcome Braii (African BBQ) the first two days were 'no sea days' due to the swell and we did some sightseeing; headed to the Cape Agulas, the most southerly point of Africa whilst stopping en route for a beer and wine tasting. I also inputted some shark observation data, which gave me a good overview of the day to day expectations and experiences on the Cage Diving Boats.

They estimate around 1000 sharks in that area with about 500 individually logged in the Darwin research program. The reason for the sharks being there? Seals. Many many seals. The sharks seen generally range between 2.5m - 4.5m with females generally larger. It can be quite hard to differentiate given the only way to tell is by the two claspers males have close to their pelvic fins, only visible during a breach or with great water visibility. The girth of the shark makes a huge difference on how impressively large these creatures are. The Diving cage was 4.5m in length and the easiest thing to size the shark up against.

In order to identity or recognise the shark we also needed to look out for the shape of the dorsal fin and if there were any noticeable scars or notches. Many of these they will have been born with and said to be as unique as our fingerprints. Other things to look out for are Rosi's (pigmentation scars/blotches), scars that could have originated from bites, mating, seal scratches, fishing lines or propellors. 

Skin colours and abrasions can be misleading as colour can seemingly change depending on other visibility factors and many abrasions are the equivalent of rubbing suede shoes the wrong way and so reversible. To top it off sharks can also heal. 

Given the speed in which they move Shark identification is not easy, but using the above and noting down shapes and sizes of the head, body, face, pectoral fin and tail even after a few days on the boat I was starting to be able to identify re-visiting sharks through size, fins and (very) obvious marks. Of course the first two days I was just too in awe to notice much more than the overall beautiful creature that is the Great White.

CAGE DIVING 

A bit of a misleading term. Cage diving itself (at least in Gaansbai) involves wearing a 6mm long wetsuit, wearing a weight belt and mask and spending much of your time with head above water, which I believe is a much more calming and less claustrophobic environment that I'd expected. When the shark swims passed you are told where to look (deep in front, down left, etc) and you hold yourself under water for as long as you can, or until the shark has gone. The water was pretty cold and the visibility when I was there wasn't great  (but not too bad either) - which I'm sure added to the experience for many; given you saw nothing, and then suddenly a Great White is a metre in front of you, or smashing into the cage. A lot of screams, a lot of laughter. They were so incredible, gracious and just utterly beautiful. Watching them swim underwater or from the boat was just mesmerising.

It has also faced (unfair in this case) controversy that the sharks are being fed unnaturally changing their feeding patterns and in turn lead to more human attacks. The chum consists of oils to spark off a scent trail for the sharks to follow and the baits are heads of either salmon or tuna that are very very rarely caught by the shark (and certainly not large enough to be of anything food worthy for them.)

VOLUNTEERING

The boat we were on was a commercial cage diving boat run by Marine Dynamics as part of the Dyer Trust, which are leaders in research and conservation of Great Whites. Check out more about them here: 

http://www.sharkwatchsa.com/en/home/

The trip was led by a qualified Marine Biologist whose main focus is shark research and conservation, educating the wider population about these mysterious creatures and their important role in the marine ecosystem (and wider) and the effects we will feel if they reach extinction. 

We were the boat skivvys; sizing up and handing out the lifejackets, raincoats, wetsuits and boots. At the end of the trips we'd clear up, clean suits, clean the boat (only once Alba and I were lucky enough to do this.. it's a man's job apparently...)

Thankfully I don't get sea sick. Most people came onto the boat saying the same quite confidently; 'no no, I don't need a sick bag,' but within a few minutes you'd see them turn and rush over with said bags. Main aim was to comfort the puking passengers whilst ensuring they puke in the bag and not off the side of the boat in the toilet. Not as easy at it sounds.

But without fail, not matter how ill anyone was, the excitement in their eyes when I'd point out the first Great White spotted; it was priceless. Other than that we got to play host, which any of my friends know I love doing, handing out food and drinks, talking to people about them and where they were from, and in spite of the puking (I think 70 - 80% on one trip) just trying to make sure everyone had a good time, calming their nerves, answering questions and getting to learn more about the sharks ourselves. It was an absolutely incredible experience. Oh, and standing up top at the front for the journey to and from the site whilst Slashfin (the boat) was jumping and crashing over the waves; magical, therapeutic and ultimately I was in a state of just pure and utter contentment. 

Penguins! 

I was also lucky enough to spend a day up at Betty Bay with a conservationist who works in the most successful African penguin (also known as the Jackass penguins) breeding program. He gave us a history and overview of the penguins and their habitats and the reasons behind the need for a conservation program. This involved looking for and marking potentially abandoned eggs,  helping move and incubate abandoned eggs, laying down penguin shelters, and even releasing penguins into the water. We were the first volunteers allowed to be involved in this and was an absolute privilege being able to do what we did. The program has rapidly expanded so if penguins are more your thing it's worthwhile getting in touch. 

Being in the towns of Gaansbai (8000 pop) and Kliensbai gave a great insight to another quieter part of South Africa and my only only only regret about this absolute incredible experience was that I'd only booked a week.  

The other volunteers and staff were genuinely wonderful and after a week I was really, really, really sad to leave. As well as some fascinating lectures on the Sharks, identification, conservation, penguins our evenings were spent either swimming, playing pool, foosball and ping pong whilst watching football at the volunteer house, having a braii (African BBQ) or cooking ourselves or going out. I went to watch locals play football, helped out at a fundraising night, went to a farmer's market BBQ, sampled the local bars and even got compliments singing Katy Perry and Kesha karaoke in what I would normally describe as a Redneck bar, but had a mix of all ethnicities getting drunk together. (Note: I was actually shit - perhaps not quite as shit as Olaf, but shit all the same.) I also pulled my hamstring cartwheeling drunk outside the volunteer house at 2am. An injury I have not yet recovered from. 

I miss the sharks. Oh, how I miss the sharks!

Snowball fights at the DMZ

Humps & me at the DMZ

Up early for a two hour drive south-east to the Korean Demilitarized Zone (DMZ) at the 38th Parallel. The roads were empty of cars, people, and snow. We stopped off en route at a service station, and managed to purchase a very welcome & much needed cup of coffee.

The scenery en route was breathtaking, and my first glimpse of how beautiful this country really was. 

*********

Below is a tiny bit of historical background on modern day Korea, but I leave this intentionally vague as I'm not a specialist on the subject, or even particularly knowledgeable and definitely don't want to pretend to be.

Korea was occupied by Japan from 1910 until 1945. During the occupation Korea rapidly industrialized, the main beneficiaries of course being the colonial rulers exploiting Korean labour and resources for their gain. Most heavy industry was in the north due to it's lack of arable land, and most agriculture was in the South.  1932 onwards brought stricter governance in which Koreans had to speak Japanese, adopt new Japanese names (1938), and change religions as well as having no political freedoms. The use of 'Comfort Woman' (Korean Sex Slaves used by the Japanese military) is still present day news as last year Japan apologised and agreed to pay compensation to the victims. 

Korea legally gained independence at the Potsdam Declaration in 1945 but was split along the 38th Parallel between the USA & Soviets for administration purposes, with both forces occupying the North and South respectively. However, in 1948 when the Republic of Korea and Democratic People's Republic of Korea were formed it became a de-facto international border. 

According to the history given to us in the DPRK, in 1950 they were invaded by the US imperialist aggressors without warning, starting the Korean War. Most of the sources I have read state that the DPRK, with the backing of China and more specifically Kim Il Sung asking Stalin and the Soviets for their help, actually moved south to invade with the intention of unifying the two Koreas. Active war continued until July 1953 where an armistice (not the end of the war) was signed, and that is the position of the two countries today. 

Currently, despite the DPRK being roughly 1/6th larger than South Korea it has a population of approximately 25 million in comparison to 50 million in the South. In 1948 there were 9 million in the North and 20 million in the South. The South Korean economy experienced rapid economic growth, and went from an incredibly poor country to having the 11th largest economy in the world. The DPRK economy stayed at the same level as the South until the 70's and in 2014 was ranked 114 by the UN. Out of 211, that is a lot higher than I would have expected, but I assume (completely my assumptions only) this is because of the industry/factories along the Chinese border, and their trade/mining agreements with the Chinese.) 

********* 

Upon arrival at the DMZ we were introduced to our guide, an Officer in the KPA (Korean People's Army) who explained to us the map below. The DMZ is 250 km long, and 4 km wide. The hut he points to is on the Northern Side, and was our next destination. 

The inside of the hut

The outside of the hut

After being given a slightly different take on the Korean War from what I previously thought, and that the DPRK had won (obviously) we were taken to the room in which the signing of the Armistice, which had a slightly different, unique North Korean name I had not heard before, that I sadly cannot remember, occurred.

Conor & I sat at the table where the Armistice was signed 

Having only predominately seen photos and footage from the South Korean border I was surprised at how relaxed the atmosphere was on this side. We were able to walk about fairly freely, and there were relatively few guards and officers in comparison. The whole complex is a lot smaller, and felt a lot less armed, though perhaps not the case. Contrary to what we were told by the North Koreans, I do believe they pose much more of a threat of aggression or invasion than the South Koreans, and their main issue would be of people wanting to escape the country, rather than defect from the South, so to me it makes sense that their side seems a little less on constant high alert.

We were taken to the roof to look over the South Korean side, and took group photos, as well as making snow angels and having a large scale snowball fight with our KPA guide. Not exactly what I imagined when I signed up for a trip to visit one of the most militarized and heavily armed borders in the world.

Despite wearing seven layers, we were constantly freezing. Each time Katie & I stepped foot outside one of us would inevitably (hopefully?) remark, 'oh it's not as cold anymore' and before finishing the sentence would be chilled to our bones. How cold can penetrate that many layers of clothes and skin in a split second is a mystery to me. However, in comparison to Pacman and Peso, who only brought dress suits we were probably pretty warm. Though, a couple of the Aussie guys just wore sweaters and seemed fine, so perhaps Katie and I just don't (can't?) do cold. 

Su Young, one of the female guides, told us rather sarcastically, and unsympathetically, 'It's winter. Its cold. It's snowing. Stop dilly dallying.' 

This monument above was erected I believe in memory of the death of Kim Il-Sung. I had to google the date to try and trigger my memory, and as he died on the 8th July 1994 according to my sources, that's probably it. I remember being stood by it, and being told about the height of it, the width of it, and the significance of these figures, but cannot remember, nor particularly wish to remember what they were, and why. 

Over the four days we were told many fairly uninteresting and uninspiring (that I believe were meant to be inspiring) truths, 'facts', figures and explanations. This is hardly unique to the DPRK, but as we were given a speech at each new statue, monument, room, part of a museum, etc, it was pretty full on. I also have no general interest in whether something is the tallest, or biggest. 

I will never forget however just how wise the Leaders all were, and how their expertise spanned a vast number of fields and disciplines and without their strict guidance many projects would have failed, and many factories would not have been built or running successfully. (A little sarcasm there perhaps, but I am paraphrasing what we were told, everywhere we went. I do believe they were all well educated.) 

Remember on school trips when you had to listen, and really wanted to laugh but couldn't. And what you wanted to laugh at wasn't even that funny anyway, which made it funnier. And then your friend keeps looking at you with a funny eye movement, also trying not to laugh, and at one point someone cracks and not laughing is possibly the hardest, and most impressive thing you have ever done? Yeh. That happened. A lot. 

We were of course also told interesting stories, 'facts,' and probably some actual facts too. Many of the speeches were obviously learnt word for word, but past that the guides were also incredibly friendly and open to questions and often interested in asking us questions. 

Buildings, bowing & bowling. First night in the DPRK.

First impressions driving into Pyongyang City; grey and empty.

En route to the city the buildings we passed were on average ten stories high, in a standard issue soviet housing style, usually grey, but occasionally pale green or brighter colours.
We saw very few people, and those we did were generally dressed in grey coats, head down, shuffling forward quickly, as I would do if I was walking home after work, when it's getting dark, in the freezing cold.

I didn't take many photos, as in all honesty I was a little nervous of doing so at first, which you can see emphasised by the crappy, blurry quality of most of the ones I did. 

As we got into the city itself we were greeted with taller and more modern, silver, mirrored buildings, and with a lack of people and atmosphere it reminded me of Canary Wharf on a winter weekend; new, deserted and soulless. Unsurprisingly perhaps since approximately 75% of the city was destroyed during the Korean War by, we were told 420,000 bombs being dropped on it, which also included napalm bombs.

Our car park was overlooked by the two faces of the Eternal leaders

Our first stop was to the Grand Monument on Mansu Hill (Mansudae).  Here stood two 22 metre bronze statues of Kim Il-Sung and Kim Jong-Il, the first erected in 1972, the second in 2011. We had been told that at each statue we would be expected to bow to the leaders, and usually in a specific manner, such as being set up in lines and walking in unison. We generally pulled this off as successfully as young primary school kids would, but don't feel we caused any offence by this. The locals seemed to be able to manage what we couldn't and look dignified, walking in unison rather than us, more like herded cattle.

Behind them is Mount Paektu, the highest mountain on the Korean Peninsula

Though it was not compulsory to bow,  aside from at the Mausoleum, we were told to let our Western guides know if we did not wish too do so. As I was there to observe the country and its people, not trying to make any kind of political point or criticise, I was happy enough to bow to the statues.

We were given the opportunity to purchase flowers to pay our respects, but in all honesty I can't remember if Katie & I did or not. (After writing this I added the picture, and can (un)clearly see flowers in Katie's hands, so I guess we did.)

We were told the sweepers were volunteers.

To the sides of the statues were two large monuments in tribute to the Revolutionary Struggle and Socialist Revolution, comprised of workers, peasants, farmers, soldiers, and looked very similar to monuments I had seen in Moscow.










Getting off the bus and just standing in Pyongyang itself was a surreal experience. There were a few locals around us, either just going about their business or also visiting the statue, and I wasn't sure what to expect from them, or what they expected from us. Largely, I felt we went unnoticed by most people on the street, which actually differs greatly from how I usually get stared at in other non Western countries, perhaps merely down to the fact I was bundled up as warm as possible, rather than having my tattoos and piercings on show.

The main exception to this disinterest during our trip was from groups of children, or when we were in closed environments such as restaurants, bars, or on the metro and people were often very keen to engage with us. That said, given that we were on a large square, surrounded by some of the biggest and tallest buildings in the city, there were comparatively very few people about, but it was early evening, so perhaps would have been different a few hours earlier.

Before heading to our hotel we stopped off at a restaurant for dinner and were put in a private room upstairs. A fantastic and varied Korean feast was served, with lots of vegetarian dishes and it was a quiet dinner (the only one of the trip I suppose) making small talk and getting to know each other.

We then headed to our hotel, Yangakdo International, a 30-story hotel located on a small island, that was in fact only slightly bigger than the hotel, and the whole place, was in a word, Grand.

The reception area was huge, but empty. Marble floors, marble desks, marble walls. There was a small aquarium tank with a large sea turtle that we genuinely thought was dead, and assumed had committed suicide. Sadly, I suppose, we found out a day or so later it was alive.

We checked in, were told not to visit the infamous mystery 5th floor, which I believe is where Otto Warmbier stole the poster from, and subsquently sentenced to 15 years hard labour. There were 800 rooms, and I was told in peak season it was fully booked. Aside from our group there didn't seem to be many more guests, and those there were were all of Asian ethnicity, and were staying on different floors, which appeared not to have working lights in the corridors, unlike ours.


The group met for a few drinks at the bar, then went for more at the Bowling Alley. The pins were held up by strings, and despite not once knocking all of them down, I was consistently bowling strikes. I liked to think that Kim Il-Sung was looking down favourably at me. We were also joined by one of the hotel waitresses who was pretty shit hot at bowling.

We finished up the night rather late in the Karaoke Room. I was genuinely surprised at how openly we could talk, and wasn't at all expecting a late night partying, but it set the precedent for the rest of the trip.

Democratic People's Republic of Korea. Part 1.

It’s been almost three years since I went to the Democratic People's Republic of Korea (DPRK) and as I still get asked about it frequently I thought I should finally get around to writing about the trip. And hopefully, at some point in the not too distant future politically, economically and socially it will be very different to how it was then, and even how it is now, as it has already changed, and sadly, I think, not for the better. 

So, how was it? The first word that comes into my mind when I’m asked that, genuinely is fun. I think this comes to the forefront of my mind as it was one thing I didn’t expect this tour to be. Interesting, educational, different, somber, and at times dull, but not fun. Given the recent attention a YouTube Vlogger got for showing a very one sided rich, privileged, party version of the country I was unsure whether to write that, but, it's the truth. It was of course, so, so much more than that, and in no way did the fact I laughed a lot change my opinion on the political leadership. Cold also comes to the forefront of my mind.  It was so very, very cold. 

A visit to the DPRK was on the top of my list of places to visit for years. I almost went in 2004, thanks to finding out I had been forced to 'save' by the UK Government as they'd placed me on an emergency tax code, but opted for a 10 week trip around South East Asia instead. After all this time, despite the usual warnings to be careful, I think family and friends had come round to the fact I was actually going, and that was okay. 

The most frequently asked question I received was ‘why are you going?’ usually followed by comments or questions on whether it is morally right to go to a country led by a dictator. The answer to ‘why', in its simplest form is that the easiest way to learn about a country, culture, social norms, and its past and present, is to visit it. The same history I read about imprints in my mind better if I've been. I start to be able to actually differentiate places, leaders, wars, significant events. And as one of the most closed off countries in the world, the mystery and lack of understanding is even greater.

I mentioned in my Moscow ramblings that I've started to want to have my opinions and expectations challenged, and happy to be disproved and educated, which, if I'm being truthful is probably a little different to my teenage self!  The more I feel I know, the more I realise how little I actually know, and how what I think I know (phew!) tends to stem from specific viewpoints under the influence of my friends, social circle, western media, western governments, and so the best way to be a little more educated is to go see for myself with an open mind. 

"Ahh, but in North Korea they only show you what they want you to see!’ 

To a certain extent, yes of course this is true. It is a very closed, controlled, hugely poor society. Though I knew we would be restricted in what we could see, I didn’t believe that the regime would employ actors on the street, the metro, or in the schools for our benefit. There ARE people in the country; they have jobs, and move from place to place. They don’t need to employ people to show this! Kim Jong Un I believe, as demonstrated in his actions and speech, doesn’t care too much what the Western leaders think, let alone a random mishmash of foreign tourists. We came across a couple from the ex-USSR who said that for them it was strange being on the other side, as they remember being the children dancing for Western tourists decades ago. 

As for the moral question - there are many, many, ‘normal’ holiday destinations built on modern slavery, with corrupt governments and appalling human rights records, that no one ever questions. Don’t judge me, and I won’t judge you. 

Katie and I went with Young Pioneer Tours and the visa process was incredibly simple. One A4 page to fill in, a couple of photos, and that was it. Katie, a freelance documentary film-maker was asked a few more questions, but there were no issues. Getting the visa for China was much more complicated and time consuming. 

We turned up at the airport extremely excited, with all pre trip nerves quashed the day before thanks to a really informative, reassuring and fun prep meeting.

On the plane I spoke to a Singaporean gentleman who worked for a fast food franchise (phonetically  pronounced Sam Tai Song) he had helped open in the DPRK. This came as a surprise to me as I didn't think that would even be possible. He was off to a conference and this was his 15th visit. He was even trying to get Air Koryo to serve his burgers, which he said tasted much better. Looking at Katie's I didn't think this would be difficult. 

The only difference to arriving at Pyongyang airport over any other small non English speaking airport was my the constant loudspeaker in my head shouting 'Oh my god, you are in North Korea!!!! WTF' I had to declare my three phones (yes, I had three), with no issue, had them handed back, and was waved through pretty quickly. 

We then split into two groups and headed straight off to the city in our tour bus. We were escorted by one YPT guide, Troy (who is a co-owner of the company) and three guides from KITC (DPRK Tour Agency) Pak Sul Yung, Tzu Huk Yung (excuse the spelling) and Mr Lim alongside our driver, Mr Pak and we also had a camera man, who we initially, but  falsely assumed was recording us on behalf of the DPRK Government. There were around 20 people in each of our two groups, ages ranging between 18 and (at a guess...) 50/60 comprising of Australians, Kiwis, Americans, Canadians, Italians, French, German, Dutch and us Brits. 

Also with us were two rappers from the USA; Pacman & Peso. The account of their trip told to The Guardian is here: We made it out... We beat the odds! It's not one I recognise. The article adheres to the usual sensationalist reporting; unjustified speculative commentary on what people are thinking or doing, sinister music in the background, and so on. It’s an incredibly interesting and complex country, it doesn’t need sensationalising! Now that I have been in some of these places I see in documentaries, in the exact same situations, I feel I have a better grasp of how truthful their portrayals are. For clarity, I don't mean the country overall, or their take on the political situation, just specific events and locations. I certainly don't feel Pacman and Peso 'beat the odds' by making it out alive. There was not one point where I felt unsafe, or less than incredibly well looked after. 

We were reminded of the do's and don'ts, most of which were fairly obvious, being respectful and not taking photos of military personal, military buildings or or any close ups of people without asking permission first. Not to wander off alone. A few additional ones such as not folding any papers or magazines that had photos of the Kim's on; these were to be kept flat or rolled up. We were also told that when taking any photo of the Kim's (such as a statue or mural) to ensure we had the whole body or mural in the frame. 

And here endeth part one.